I have developed posterior pelvic pain, or what is known as pregnancy sciatica. PPP is not actually sciatica, which is caused by a crushed nerve, but the feeling is basically the same--an awful, stabbing pain in the center of my left butt cheek. Nice.
I begged the King last night to please, please rub my butt and make it feel better, but he was very hesitant. I think he was a bit scared of both the way I was vigorously thrusting my ass toward him and the fact that I announced that my waist is now 40 inches in circumference. That is MORE THAN A YARD, people! I am a yard around! A yard is a measurement for a football field, not a body part. I'm fairly disturbed by this, and it didn't help when the King gleefully crowed, "Soon you'll be twice this big! You'll be, like, eight feet around!!" See if he gets a blowjob this month.